Female in Motion

(The following post originally aired on October 28, 2013. Today is the last day of Breast Cancer Awareness Month.) God gave me beautiful jewels during my cancer journey. My breast cancer journey is almost at a close. In the last year and a half, God gave me some precious gifts. I thought I would just bear down, and tough out this cancer battle, instead I have found delicate and multi-faceted jewels placed in my path. Rest: I didn't ever sit and get quiet until I was forced to with cancer. Seems like I always had something to do, or somewhere to be. Now, I have to schedule in those quiet times to relax my mind and gather my senses. Prayer: I've always considered myself a prayer person, but I really became a warrior during my cancer journey. Not how you think, though. I was praying for others , not myself. There are so many around us that are suffering. Achieving a deeper level of worship and prayer makes me hungry for more. Humility: I realized earl...

(This post originally published on October 1, 2012, during the time I was receiving treatment for breast cancer. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.) A week from today, I will return to Cancer Treatment Centers of America in Zion, IL, and if all goes well, I will begin my chemotherapy treatment. Within a few days after that, I will lose all my hair. It won't all fall out at once, but when it starts to get sparse, I'm going to shave it off. And I'm okay with that. My body image has not always been so great. When I was a teenager, I had a lot of self-loathing. I thought my legs were so fat, at 105 pounds, that I refused to wear shorts during the summer. Even in my 20's, after my first brush with cancer, I covered the large scar on my right arm on the hottest July days in Kansas. I am 50 years old now, and overweight, scarred, stretch marked, gray haired and wrinkled. Losing weight, gaining weight, short haired or long haired, I am still me. With ...

I had a "lite" version of breast cancer. It seems like there are a million products on the market now that are "light," "lite," or "reduced" in some fashion. Weird, but I think about my cancer in that way. I had a very mild case of breast cancer, or Cancer Lite. I almost feel like I shouldn't claim to be a cancer survivor. So many others have really, truly struggled with side effects of treatment, horrible pain from surgeries and catastrophic changes to their daily lives. While I did have three surgeries, six doses of chemotherapy and 30 radiation treatments, my body tolerated all of it fairly well, and I seem to be bouncing back rapidly. Call it "survivor's guilt," but I went through a couple of months after treatment where I felt a bit ashamed. I gained weight, had tons of personal support and a great experience with my cancer team. During this time, a young man I knew died from liver cancer. He was a vibrant, strong C...

Female in Motion at the Arkansas City Relay for Life 2013   John 10:10 (NKJV) The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. When my doctor told me I had breast cancer, I went into battle mode, full force. The Hubster and I prayed about it, then got a plan together. I went from doctor to doctor, hospital to hospital, until I found the best fit for me. Here's the interesting part...I kept right on with my life. I still worked, grocery shopped, did my laundry and paid my bills. Cancer was part of my life, but it didn't take over. What are your circumstances? Is there something that makes you want to stop trying? I wish I could whisper this truth in your ear.                                    ...

 Psalm 55:22 (KJV) Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee. Stuff. Worries. Burdens. We all have things we carry...on our backs and in our hearts. Whether you have loads of burdens or just one big, bulky boulder, they are heavy. Some people say I carry a lot of burdens. I just finished treatment for breast cancer. The Hubster suffers with a chronic blood cancer. Our 16-year-old data processing business has taken some very hard blows this year. Life here on earth is unsure. I may be cancer-free the rest of my life, or it may recur. The Hubster may outlive his illness. We have loved ones who have fought cancer and won; we have lost others that we held so dear. Our business may bounce back and become stronger than ever, or I may have to go out and pound the pavement for a new job. I know this for sure. No matter how much I worry, or stay up at night, or even wring my hands...I have no power to change the future. It's in God's capable hands. Life may ba...

Female in Motion, one year ago. Today is my 51st birthday. My life has changed greatly since my 50th birthday. One year ago today, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I sat in the doctor's office, The Hubster by my side, and comforted them both. "It's okay," I said, "It's my turn. I'm going to be okay." ...And I am. I am strong, because He gives my strength. I am brave, because He is always beside me. I am positive, because He gives me peace. I am an encourager, because I am following His will for my life. My Savior has been by my side, every step of the way. I am so grateful...for my life, my family, my friends, my faith. I want no other. On Monday, I start six weeks of radiation treatments in Winfield, five days a week. Please continue to lift me up in prayer. I promise to bring your names to my Father's throne daily. If you comment on this post, or on the Female in Motion Facebook page, I will put your name in my prayer jo...

Most writers (and bloggers) like to make New Years resolutions. I do not. For the last decade, however, I have been praying about things I want God to lay on my heart. Maybe a word, or a goal to focus on in the year ahead. This year, when I prayed for a word, God gave me three: Back on Track . When I meditated and prayed about this phrase, I got the message clearly that my Heavenly Father wants me to be about His Business...I need to get back to what He commanded me to do three years ago, start an encouragement ministry through my blog, writing and speaking, helping women to recognize the gifts God has given them and using them to their fullest potential. You see, since February 2012, I have been in survival mode. Or, maybe I should say "survivor mode." I'm currently fighting a battle with breast cancer. Treatment is going good and I should be done by the end of March. After that, I will rest a few months and then do reconstruction. It is good and right that I shoul...

I was just discovering my true self when I met The Hubster. It wasn't his fault, but I threw myself into being a great wife, cook and housekeeper. When my daughters came along, I simply wanted make their lives as happy as possible. Somewhere along the way, I forgot to find out exactly who I was, and I have only recently gotten back on track. The years between have been a lot of fun, and I've learned a lot of important stuff, like what I am not. I am an office manager, but that does not define my talents. I am married to The Hubster, but that does not define my identity. I am the mother of two children, but that does not define my life. I am a member of a Baptist church, but that does not define my faith. I am a breast cancer patient, but that does not define my personality. What defines me? Am I someone's employee, someone's wife, someone's mother, some church's member, someone's patient? Yes, I am those things, but those things do not define w...

 (Pictured above, from left to right: My mom, Marilyn, sister, Laura, sister, Donna, and me!) Yesterday, I spent Thanksgiving Day with my family. Although I do spend most holidays with my family, this year I am extra-grateful for them. Through my cancer journey, these people have been incredibly loving and supportive. God has blessed me abundantly through family.  If you don't already know, my mom and sister, Donna, are also breast cancer survivors. I come from a long line of strong women. Because of the encouragement of my family, friends and loved ones, I am able to face each day with fresh hope for strength and healing. I have so much to be thankful for this year. *** Dear Father, I am thankful for the blessings You bestow on me so freely. Your guidance through this time of healing is precious to me. Forgive me when I doubt Your plan for my life. Thank you for a time to reflect on Your goodness. In Jesus' name, Amen.

I had to share this photo The Hubster took last night. My mother-in-law, Judy Skiles, and her best friend, Pat Brown, got their heads shaved yesterday, in my honor. I don't know if I am a bad influence or I started a new fad! Either way, I am humbled by all the love, encouragement and support I am receiving. God bless each and every one of you.

 While running errands today, I stopped to talk to an acquaintance. She heard I had breast cancer, and wanted to tell me I was in her prayers. We spoke for a few moments, and when we parted, she remarked, "I love how positive you are!" Then there are the others--you know them. The folks who say, "What are you doing out?" They have these pained expressions and say, "How are you... really ?" Like I'm going to burst into flames at any moment. I made a decision to find a little spot of joy in every day. Something to make me smile. The Hubster and I laugh a lot. Cancer can be a humbling experience; there are lots of awkward situations involved. You have to have a sharp sense of humor. People with cancer don't lay in bed all day, eating bonbons and watching TV. We go to work, grocery shop, go out to eat and even clean our toilets. Our church held a revival last week. The evangelist, Dr. Fred Johnson, of Calvary Boys Ranch in Eufaula, OK, w...

   People see me out and about town, shopping, going out to dinner, or to church. They seem surprised to see me, like people with cancer should be at home with the curtains drawn. "How are you?" they ask, worry dripping from every word. "I'm doing great!" I say, with a smile. Why not? It's true! God is blessing my life with lots of good stuff. The Hubster and I just celebrated 31 years of marriage, our business is growing, we eat regularly and pay our bills, we have a beautiful family and great, supportive friends. We are blessed!  Breast cancer is merely one circumstance in my life. It does not consume my whole life. Hopefully, in a couple of years, it will be a dim memory. My attitude is that life is good and God has blessed me. I've been through enough trials in my 50 years to know that those valleys are temporary, so treat them as such. Live above your circumstances.  *Decide. Make a conscious decision to trust Christ with your life. *Commi...

Last weekend was quiet. The Hubster and I had just returned from a business seminar out of town. We spent Saturday and Sunday doing a few simple household chores, but mostly, napping, watching old movies, attending church, and resting. It was peaceful and much-needed. Monday morning brought bad news. I had surgery at the Cancer Treatment Centers of America-Chicago campus on Friday, July 6. The procedure was to widen the margins from my original lumpectomy, to take four ancillary lymph nodes from under my arm, and to get an IORT Boost. (That is inter-operative radiation therapy). Yes, I had radiation treatment while I was on the surgical table. During the surgery, they attached two surgical drains to get rid of excess fluid. It's a common practice. After the surgery, I was fitted for a compression sleeve for my right arm. Removal of lymph nodes on the right side causes a risk of lymphedema, an inflammatory condition. I will wear the sleeve each day for two months, and while lift...