Female in Motion

Proverbs 17:22 (KJV) A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Lots of people have asked me how I'm feeling. You know, folks with cancer get that question often. I'm honest with my response. I feel great! Really, God is blessing and I feel really good. And then, they all say the same thing, "You have such a great attitude!" Although I have had times of sadness and depression in my life, now is not one of them. All the "what ifs" have come to pass. I have cancer. My husband has cancer. All the monsters that were under the bed, are now sleeping peacefully beside us. There is nothing else to be afraid of. I quickly realized that I had no control. This was firmly God's department. So I turned it completely over to Him. Crazy, right? Now, I just put one foot in front of the other and take each day fresh and new. I spend a lot of time on my knees, too, talking to God about my fears, gratitude and burdens for othe...

I'm packing some items in a backpack to take with me when I have chemotherapy treatments at Cancer Treatment Centers of America in Zion, IL. So far, I have a small lap blanket, a fleece hoodie that zips all the way down front, photos of my favorite people, peppermints, hand sanitizer, my MP3 player and my collection of short stories by John Steinbeck. Am I missing anything? If you think of something vital I have forgotten, please let me know. Because of a scheduling conflict, I won't be able to start chemo for two more weeks (Oct. 10). This has left me feeling a little frustrated and blue. Not that I am so excited to have chemo, but that I just want to get the process moving forward. I don't want to be a cancer patient the rest of my life. After putting this chapter in the past, I want to move forward with my writing and our business. Here is my post-cancer "to do" list: 1. Take a vacation with The Hubster, my mom and the kids. 2. Send query letters to a ...

Proverbs 1:8 (KJV) My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother: What is your legacy? I used this as a writing exercise back in 2005, and recently came upon it in my computer files. Writing mostly about my daughters and how I hoped they would remember me after I am gone, I enumerated the things I loved about my life, this earth, and my time here. My main focus, however, was on the hopes and dreams I had for their lives. When my daughters were small, I wanted them to love God, go to college, get high-paying jobs and marry well. Now that they’re both grown and independent, (well, relatively so!), I have changed my outlook. If they are happy and healthy, I won’t quibble about how much they make or whether they married a millionaire. I realize now that the most important feeling in this world is fulfillment, as in doing what is God’s will for your life. Many activities may provide this feeling, like parenthood, working at a career or ...

Why go all the way to Chicago when there are great hospitals in Kansas? First of all, there are great doctors and hospitals in Kansas. I know, I got great care in Winfield and Wichita. I didn't come to this decision lightly. There was a storm in my soul when the Wichita oncologist said 16 weeks of chemotherapy. Of course, I wasn't excited about doing chemo, but something was wrong. I needed more answers; more explanation. I knew we needed to look elsewhere. The Hubster and I made a short list of three other places we wanted to consult: KU Medical Center, MD Anderson and Cancer Treatment Centers of America. As I checked my email the next morning, a pop-up advertisement for Cancer Treatment Centers of America appeared. I went to the website and started looking around. We had researched this hospital when The Hubster was first diagnosed with multiple myeloma.  We assumed we would drive to Tulsa, their closest location. When I called the 800 number, the courteous custome...

Psalm 73:23-26 (NKJV) Nevertheless I am continually with You; You hold me by my right hand. You will guide me with Your counsel, And afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever . The Hubster takes good care of me. During this time of illness and healing, he has been a strong source of comfort and support. I look to him for help with carrying heavy grocery sacks, changing cat boxes and vacuuming the living room. The Hubster also talks to me when I'm feeling low, gives great hugs and prays with me. Is he the source of my security? No. I know that my mounting medical bills will be paid. Whatever work piles up while I am getting treatment will be done.  Errands will be run. The house will be cleaned (eventually!). All of this will be accomplished whether I worry over it or not. Even though I have a loving, Godl...

It has been two months since my lumpectomy. I have enjoyed the respite. Spending my time working, exercising, writing, and living my life, I felt normal. Or as normal as you can feel after a cancer diagnosis. Only the occasional doctor's appointment, or a glimpse at my scars, reminds me of the battle. I needed this time to recover. A respite is defined by Dictionary.com as "an interval of relief." The time between my surgery and today has been a haven of rest, an oasis of hope. In the last week, I have slept through my alarm every day. My body is demanding what my soul cries out for...rest. Yes, sleep, but also peace. I visited my mom last week. We spent the day talking and doing a small project. It was just what I needed. The Hubster has helped so much. He encourages me to take it easy and makes sure that I laugh every day. We've watched old, funny movies several times a week. Having dinner with family and friends is a great way to relax. I walk outside in...

(Video courtesy of Samantha LaFantasie)  The Arkansas City Relay for Life event was held last Friday night at Wilson Park. There were five strong women on the Female in Motion team: my mom, Marilyn, my sister, Donna, my friends, Deanne and Samantha, and me. Our support team was there, too: The Hubster, my nephew, Nick, my cousin, Darci, our friends, Mark and Julie, and Sam's husband, Phil.  It was worth it. All the planning, shopping, coordinating, going to meetings, emailing and cajoling people to donate, dragging all the stuff to the park, and stressing...it was worth it. When I put on my Survivor t-shirt and held The Hubster's hand as we walked with everyone who was affected by cancer, I realized the reason I had done all of this. To make an impact in my community against cancer. Cancer is random. It strikes whomever it pleases. To try to make some sense out of this chaotic time in my life, I felt a purpose in organizing a Relay for Life team. It was humbling to...